by Valerie Helmbreck
Talk about your niche markets, Jennifer Portland (aka the Excel Rain Man, er, Woman) found one: Frustrated Excel spreadsheet users.
Portland claims she’s just the person Excel users need. She’ll solve spreadsheet dilemmas so you don’t have to — for a modest fee.
The company’s no-frills Web site (excelrainman.com) explains the simple process — you submit a request, get a quote for the solution, pay via PayPal and voila, problem solved.
Sounds pretty straight forward, right?
It’s actually Portland’s marketing approach that’s a little quirky. Instead of the usual dry, technical press releases of many software service vendors, ExcelRainMan touts “Ninja-like skills” and the appeal of dumping client work.
Says the press release:
“You’re a pharmaceutical tycoon aggregating addresses of FDA pals. You’re a couch potato charting “innocence lost” on the CW. You’re a middle manager tracking clients 7, 8, and 10. No matter your prerogative, pivot tables with Jennifer Portland, a cell-formatting, formula-postulating, systems-engineering graduate who moonlights as Excel Rain Man. Whether LIFO or FIFO, Portland swears her spreadsheet can beat up your spreadsheet. She honed her skills at a computer camp her parents made her go to on school breaks. Now you can leave the IT guys alone and utilize her “ninja-like skills” for a small fee. Send her your query; she’ll set up templates, solve problems, give tutorials, and share formulas. Turnaround time is ypically one business day (rush available), so you can dump your client work, job chores, or anal-retentive project ideas — and get back to business as a blogger extraordinaire.”
Anal-retentive project ideas? You go girl!